Marriage done right is fulfilling and fun.

There are three things that we believe about marriage and want to share here:

Marriage is your most important human relationship
Marriage done right is fulfilling and fun
Good things spring from healthy marriages

We’re writing a series of three posts to explain a little more about what we believe and why we believe it. Today we’re focusing on this idea:

Marriage done right is fulfilling and fun.

There are really two thoughts wrapped up in this one, and they’re equally important. Marriage is fulfilling and marriage is fun. We’ll explain each piece of this belief and then the importance of holding them in balance.

Marriage is fulfilling. The dictionary defines fulfilling as, “making someone satisfied or happy because of fully developing their character or abilities.” There’s a deep satisfaction that comes from growing personally.

Some ways that we’ve each grown include:

We trained together and completed a half marathon.
We each hold our Series 7 and Series 66 licenses (if you’re not in finance, they’re two long difficult tests that take months to study for and are not fun).
We study the enneagram and better understand ourselves and each other.
We encourage one another’s interests, which has lead to everything from book clubs to club sports and a whole range of activities through the years.

There are a couple things that are helpful in creating a space that allows for each partner to find fulfillment.

The first is time management. I can’t think of a goal that doesn’t take the commitment of time. Work together to manage your time well and in such a way that each partner has the time necessary to work on developing themselves. The second is encouragement. Cheer each other on! Show interest, ask questions, be your spouse’s #1 fan.

Marriage is fun.

We wish that this one could go without saying, but unfortunately we’ve seen a lot of marriages that are missing that spark of fun. We laugh in our marriage a lot. We tell our kids all the time how lucky they are to have us as parents because we’re hilarious… they roll their eyes. What’s fun for us may not be fun for you, but here are some things that we’ve done to keep the fun alive

We spontaneously and randomly ran around our cul-de-sac with no pants on in the rain late one night. It wasn’t the naked mile, no laws were broken and there were no witnesses. It was ridiculous, it was exhilarating, and now it’s a memory that makes us smile.
We go to comedy shows pretty regularly. When a favorite comedian is in town, we do our best to get to the show. Taking a more budget friendly approach, we’ve been to the local comedy club too and had a great time.
We celebrate everything. We celebrate every holiday including St. Patrick’s Day, Cinco de Mayo, National Margarita Day, National Pancake Day, the first day of spring, the first day it hits 80 degrees, anything and everything that we can celebrate, we do.

Having fun together creates shared experiences and cultivates connection.

This is a both/and, not an either/or.

Marriage should create a context where fulfillment, which is individual can happen. Shared fun is what helps to secure your connection and keep you grounded with one another. So – marriage done right is fulfilling and fun. We hope that your marriage is both!

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